Last Friday I had my last chemotherapy treatment. I am so happy that phase is over. While the last treatment wasn't as bad as the previous one, I did still throw up at the hospital immediately after it was over. I can envision the nausea and other side effects only getting worse as time goes on, so I'm glad to be done with chemo.
Yesterday I had my radiation planning appointment. It went smoothly. I talked to the resident doctor, Dr. Wood for a bit. He explained the planning process again and we talked a bit about side effects and other questions I had. He mentioned again that the chance of getting another cancer from the radiation is .25% per year. Because I'm relatively young (I sure don't feel like it anymore!) that means in 20 years, I'll have a 5% chance and in 40 years a 10% chance.
During the actual planning session, I laid on the table of a CT machine while the radiation technicians got me into place and made various markings, took measurements and photos. They even took a photo of my face just for the purpose of visual identification - so they can physically see that they are giving radiation to the right person.
Part of the preparations included them making a mold of my face. A technician took a warm plastic mesh with a hard frame on three sides and stretched the mesh down over my face and chin and connected it to the cradle on the table where my head was laying. Although I was trying to keep my eyes closed (the stretchy mesh kept pulling them open), I was able to see and breathe through the holes in the mesh. I was warned that some people have claustrophobic issues when this is done, but I didn't experience that. Once in place, the mesh was cooled off to help it harden and keep its shape.
Once everything was ready, they scanned me using the CT machine - with the mesh mask still keeping me in place. The doctor will use the images from the CT scan to determine how to set up the radiation so that it radiates the areas that should receive it and avoids other areas as much as possible. I was also marked in three places with a blue marker - one on my chest and one on each side near the top of my ribs. The markings were covered with clear stickers to help keep from washing off. These markings, along with the mask, will help them ensure that I am lined up properly every day.
After the planning was over, the nurse practitioner wanted to talk to me more about side effects. She gave me a booklet with details as well as some special lotion and special mouthwash. The lotion is for the area of my skin that gets radiated, because it will start to look sunburned over time. The radiation from the sun is how people get a tan or sunburned, so the effects of the radiation treatments are similar.
I was given my first appointment for radiation. It starts October 5th and will continue every weekday for 3.5 to 4 weeks. That gives me just over a week of normalness before the next phase of my cancer treatment starts. Although going to the hospital every day will suck, at least it will be over in a month and I'll (hopefully) be cancer-free and back to a normal life in time for the holidays.
Showing posts with label chemotherapy. Show all posts
Showing posts with label chemotherapy. Show all posts
Friday, September 25, 2009
Wednesday, September 9, 2009
Why doesn't alcohol come in other scents?
My treatment last Thursday SUCKED! Chemo days are always long days, but in addition to treatment, I was also seeing my oncologist. I'm not sure what it was exactly, but I threw up several times that day. I went in at noon to have my blood drawn for lab work as usual. I was a bit nervous because more often than not, they have trouble accessing my port and the fact that I nearly threw up from the saline and/or heparin they push through it during my previous treatment. I noticed immediately that just the smells of the hospital, such as alcohol wipes or alcohol-based cleaning products or "clean" as Maria calls the smell, starts making me feel queasy. (Note to Self: Start bringing spray air freshener along to treatments.) I explained to the nurse how I nearly tossed my cookies two weeks earlier so she agreed to push the saline in slowly. It helped, but I did still taste it, especially at the end when she had to push faster to clear the blood out of the IV line. After the saline flush, they inject heparin, which helps prevent blood clots from forming in the port line. The heparin tastes like the saline, only worse. I made it out of the lab without vomiting, although I could tell I was not out of the clear yet.
We had almost an hour until I saw Dr. Fenske so Maria and I left the hospital and went to Bruegger's Bagels nearby so I could eat lunch. I thought I would be fine, but it hit me in the parking lot before we went inside to eat. I threw up. Luckily, not much came up since I had barely eaten anything for breakfast. The good thing was that the parking lot was behind the store, so I wasn't vomiting on Wisconsin Ave. at least. I was embarrassed a bit though when I saw a couple people come around the corner to the lot just in time to witness me puking. I probably ruined their lunch.
As usual, the doctor's office was behind. My appointment was scheduled for 1pm. I think the nurse practitioner, Julie, came in around 1:45pm. She asked me the normal questions. I explained how I had been feeling like crap lately, even on the days where I normally feel great. She checked my blood test results and everything looked normal. I also told her how I was becoming more sensitive to the saline and heparin and how I threw up after having my blood drawn. She suggested I take a lorazepam prior to coming to chemo as nausea can be triggered by many things.
After Julie left the room, it was approximately 10 more minutes before Dr. Fenske came in to talk to me. He didn't really tell me anything new, but he did clarify the results from my last PET scan a bit. He said while the CT portion of the scan showed a small amount of cancer still, the PET scan was "negative." I asked if that meant that I was cancer-free. He didn't come right out and say I was cancer-free, but said that sometimes the CT scan shows lymph nodes that just stay swollen or possible scar tissue. He explained the PET scan shows "active cancer," which in my case, was negative. So that's good to know. Plus, I'll have had 4 more chemo treatments after that scan, so I should really be in good shape then. He set me up to have my next PET scan in the beginning of December, which will be around 6 weeks after I'm finished with radiation.
After my appointment with Dr. Fenske, we headed to chemo. Of course, even though we were late (due to the doctor's office running late), I still had to wait around a bit. The chemo itself went normally, but when it was almost over, I went to use the bathroom, and began throwing up. It really sucked and it just kept coming. When I was finished, the nurse gave me more fluids through my IV and ordered me some liquid lorazepam from the pharmacy to inject in me. Eventually we left and I laid down on the sofa almost immediately after getting home.
Later that night, I did not feel good whatsoever. I had the chills and was super cold. I took my temperature and it was 99.5, so I knew I had a touch of a fever. I fell asleep on the couch after awhile and woke up extremely hot and sweaty. I took my temperature again and it had rose to 100.3. I knew if it got to 100.5 or higher I would have to call the hospital, per their standard instructions. I started to cool down almost immediately after waking up though, so I didn't have to.
Since then, I've been trying to take it easy so that I don't feel so exhausted all the time. I think my usual schedule of feeling yucky for a week followed by a week of feeling normal has ended. I'm trying not to run myself down by doing too much, which is not always easy since I have stuff I want to or need to get done. The next few days won't be easy because we have our charity yard sale and lemonade stand benefiting the Leukemia & Lymphoma Society this Saturday and I still haven't started getting things together for it. But, I know in the end, it will come together somehow. Hopefully we will have a good turnout and good weather. My friend Jada is trekking down from Port Washington to join us. I'm really looking forward to it.
The good news for me is that I only have one more chemotherapy treatment left. I'm so happy because I can only imagine the chemo getting harder and harder to deal with from this point on. Even today, nearly a week after chemo, I still feel nauseous at times. Certain smells and thoughts trigger it. It was even hard to type some of this post at times. I know I still have radiation treatments coming soon, but at this point, I'm almost welcoming the change.
We had almost an hour until I saw Dr. Fenske so Maria and I left the hospital and went to Bruegger's Bagels nearby so I could eat lunch. I thought I would be fine, but it hit me in the parking lot before we went inside to eat. I threw up. Luckily, not much came up since I had barely eaten anything for breakfast. The good thing was that the parking lot was behind the store, so I wasn't vomiting on Wisconsin Ave. at least. I was embarrassed a bit though when I saw a couple people come around the corner to the lot just in time to witness me puking. I probably ruined their lunch.
As usual, the doctor's office was behind. My appointment was scheduled for 1pm. I think the nurse practitioner, Julie, came in around 1:45pm. She asked me the normal questions. I explained how I had been feeling like crap lately, even on the days where I normally feel great. She checked my blood test results and everything looked normal. I also told her how I was becoming more sensitive to the saline and heparin and how I threw up after having my blood drawn. She suggested I take a lorazepam prior to coming to chemo as nausea can be triggered by many things.
After Julie left the room, it was approximately 10 more minutes before Dr. Fenske came in to talk to me. He didn't really tell me anything new, but he did clarify the results from my last PET scan a bit. He said while the CT portion of the scan showed a small amount of cancer still, the PET scan was "negative." I asked if that meant that I was cancer-free. He didn't come right out and say I was cancer-free, but said that sometimes the CT scan shows lymph nodes that just stay swollen or possible scar tissue. He explained the PET scan shows "active cancer," which in my case, was negative. So that's good to know. Plus, I'll have had 4 more chemo treatments after that scan, so I should really be in good shape then. He set me up to have my next PET scan in the beginning of December, which will be around 6 weeks after I'm finished with radiation.
After my appointment with Dr. Fenske, we headed to chemo. Of course, even though we were late (due to the doctor's office running late), I still had to wait around a bit. The chemo itself went normally, but when it was almost over, I went to use the bathroom, and began throwing up. It really sucked and it just kept coming. When I was finished, the nurse gave me more fluids through my IV and ordered me some liquid lorazepam from the pharmacy to inject in me. Eventually we left and I laid down on the sofa almost immediately after getting home.
Later that night, I did not feel good whatsoever. I had the chills and was super cold. I took my temperature and it was 99.5, so I knew I had a touch of a fever. I fell asleep on the couch after awhile and woke up extremely hot and sweaty. I took my temperature again and it had rose to 100.3. I knew if it got to 100.5 or higher I would have to call the hospital, per their standard instructions. I started to cool down almost immediately after waking up though, so I didn't have to.
Since then, I've been trying to take it easy so that I don't feel so exhausted all the time. I think my usual schedule of feeling yucky for a week followed by a week of feeling normal has ended. I'm trying not to run myself down by doing too much, which is not always easy since I have stuff I want to or need to get done. The next few days won't be easy because we have our charity yard sale and lemonade stand benefiting the Leukemia & Lymphoma Society this Saturday and I still haven't started getting things together for it. But, I know in the end, it will come together somehow. Hopefully we will have a good turnout and good weather. My friend Jada is trekking down from Port Washington to join us. I'm really looking forward to it.
The good news for me is that I only have one more chemotherapy treatment left. I'm so happy because I can only imagine the chemo getting harder and harder to deal with from this point on. Even today, nearly a week after chemo, I still feel nauseous at times. Certain smells and thoughts trigger it. It was even hard to type some of this post at times. I know I still have radiation treatments coming soon, but at this point, I'm almost welcoming the change.
Friday, August 7, 2009
Good news, disappointment, and a crappy day
Yesterday was my fifth chemo treatment. That would be Cycle 3, Day 1. I woke up unusually tired feeling that morning and as usual I was not looking forward to getting treatment. I'm always concerned about the nurses and techs having trouble with my port, I know that it's always a long day, I know that each chemo treatment brings me about a week of feeling like crap in various ways. I just hard to feel happy on those days. It really hit me when we were pulling into the Froedtert Clinical Cancer Center parking structure. That is when I felt most down about everything that was yet to come.
My lab work was scheduled for 11:30am. We got there a bit early and they called me in pretty fast. Must have been a slow day. Thankfully the tech had no trouble accessing my port, unlike the last two visits. What did affect me is the saline flush they do. They flush the port/line with saline from a syringe before they draw blood and then again afterwards. Every time, I can TASTE it. It is just an awful taste that I can't even describe. It sort of tastes like it smells - medicine-y. Some people say metallic-y. I don't go around tasting much metal so I can't say that's what it's like but either way its horrible. I've begun sucking on hard candy while they do it but it doesn't help much. Yesterday was the worst ever. When the tech flushed at the end of the blood work, I gagged. I had to force myself not to throw up instantly from the taste. It was really terrible.
After the lab, we had about 45 minutes before my appointment with Dr. Fenske. Maria and I shared an unhealthy lunch in the cafeteria. Nothing really looked good, so we got fried chicken with sides of macaroni & cheese and mashed potatoes w/gravy. They probably even shouldn't sell that fattening of food in a hospital, should they? The chicken was pretty tasty but the sides were bland. At least we were sharing one entree, so we didn't have to feel as bad about how unhealthy we were eating. Oh, we also topped it off by sharing a piece of Elegant Farmer Apple Pie. We couldn't resist. We've always wanted to try their pie, but never felt right spending $13 on a pie before. It was super delicious!
On to my appointment with the oncologist. First, they called us back late, and then it took awhile for Julie, the nurse practitioner to come into the room, and then after she left, the doctor came in. So the good news is, based on the PET scan I had the day before, the cancer has shrunk drastically. If I remember right, it's now something like 2cm x 1cm in size. The nurse and doctor seemed very pleased with the progress. On a side note, they also both are impressed that I still have a full head of hair. Of course, I lose a bunch everyday, but overall it still looks good - just thinner than normal.
The doctor also talked to me about my options for continuing treatment. I could go the normal, time tested approach of having less chemo followed by radiation -or- I could try the less tested approach of skipping radiation and just having more chemo treatments. I really wanted to avoid radiation if possible. There are risks to having radiation but there is also a slightly higher risk of having the cancer come back if I don't have the radiation. Since I told myself at the beginning of this that I would do what it takes to get rid of it, hopefully for good, I told him we should include radiation. I'll be seeing the radiation oncologist next Friday for a consultation. I think talking to him will help me truly decide if that is the best option for me or not. Since I still have 3 more chemo treatments to go through before radiation would start, I'm pretty sure I can still change my mind. A lot of it depends on where exactly they want to radiate. If its just my neck, that's one thing but if they want to do any lower, near my chest - that may be a deal breaker for me.
So even though I received good news about the cancer shrinking, I didn't feel happy about it. I think in my head I already worked out that the cancer would be amazingly gone already so I would just need to finish up the planned chemo and could skip radiation altogether. I realize that's not rational and I'm normally a very logical person, but it's just what I've been hoping for I guess. So finding out the cancer is still there, just much, much smaller and that I should still have radiation was disappointing somewhat.
Since the doctor appointment ran late, I was late checking in for chemo. The appointment was for 1:30pm, but I checked in around 1:50pm. You'd think they would have been ready and waiting for me to show up, but no. Instead, we sat around some more. They finally took us back to start around 2:30pm. I warned the nurse about my gagging on the saline flush earlier that day. I did OK when she flushed at the beginning of chemo but at the end of it when she flushed again, I nearly lost it. More than a gagging, I really had to control myself from throwing up. On the way out of the hospital, I stopped to use the restroom and I almost threw up in the sink while washing my hands. It really sucked. I felt nauseous for a long time. Just thinking about the saline taste would make me feel sick again. I had to keep my mind off it. Eventually with some fresh air, deep breathing, and trying not to think about it, I was OK. Maria and I ate dinner and ran to a few stores on the way home. After all that, I was just exhausted from the long, crappy day.
My lab work was scheduled for 11:30am. We got there a bit early and they called me in pretty fast. Must have been a slow day. Thankfully the tech had no trouble accessing my port, unlike the last two visits. What did affect me is the saline flush they do. They flush the port/line with saline from a syringe before they draw blood and then again afterwards. Every time, I can TASTE it. It is just an awful taste that I can't even describe. It sort of tastes like it smells - medicine-y. Some people say metallic-y. I don't go around tasting much metal so I can't say that's what it's like but either way its horrible. I've begun sucking on hard candy while they do it but it doesn't help much. Yesterday was the worst ever. When the tech flushed at the end of the blood work, I gagged. I had to force myself not to throw up instantly from the taste. It was really terrible.
After the lab, we had about 45 minutes before my appointment with Dr. Fenske. Maria and I shared an unhealthy lunch in the cafeteria. Nothing really looked good, so we got fried chicken with sides of macaroni & cheese and mashed potatoes w/gravy. They probably even shouldn't sell that fattening of food in a hospital, should they? The chicken was pretty tasty but the sides were bland. At least we were sharing one entree, so we didn't have to feel as bad about how unhealthy we were eating. Oh, we also topped it off by sharing a piece of Elegant Farmer Apple Pie. We couldn't resist. We've always wanted to try their pie, but never felt right spending $13 on a pie before. It was super delicious!
On to my appointment with the oncologist. First, they called us back late, and then it took awhile for Julie, the nurse practitioner to come into the room, and then after she left, the doctor came in. So the good news is, based on the PET scan I had the day before, the cancer has shrunk drastically. If I remember right, it's now something like 2cm x 1cm in size. The nurse and doctor seemed very pleased with the progress. On a side note, they also both are impressed that I still have a full head of hair. Of course, I lose a bunch everyday, but overall it still looks good - just thinner than normal.
The doctor also talked to me about my options for continuing treatment. I could go the normal, time tested approach of having less chemo followed by radiation -or- I could try the less tested approach of skipping radiation and just having more chemo treatments. I really wanted to avoid radiation if possible. There are risks to having radiation but there is also a slightly higher risk of having the cancer come back if I don't have the radiation. Since I told myself at the beginning of this that I would do what it takes to get rid of it, hopefully for good, I told him we should include radiation. I'll be seeing the radiation oncologist next Friday for a consultation. I think talking to him will help me truly decide if that is the best option for me or not. Since I still have 3 more chemo treatments to go through before radiation would start, I'm pretty sure I can still change my mind. A lot of it depends on where exactly they want to radiate. If its just my neck, that's one thing but if they want to do any lower, near my chest - that may be a deal breaker for me.
So even though I received good news about the cancer shrinking, I didn't feel happy about it. I think in my head I already worked out that the cancer would be amazingly gone already so I would just need to finish up the planned chemo and could skip radiation altogether. I realize that's not rational and I'm normally a very logical person, but it's just what I've been hoping for I guess. So finding out the cancer is still there, just much, much smaller and that I should still have radiation was disappointing somewhat.
Since the doctor appointment ran late, I was late checking in for chemo. The appointment was for 1:30pm, but I checked in around 1:50pm. You'd think they would have been ready and waiting for me to show up, but no. Instead, we sat around some more. They finally took us back to start around 2:30pm. I warned the nurse about my gagging on the saline flush earlier that day. I did OK when she flushed at the beginning of chemo but at the end of it when she flushed again, I nearly lost it. More than a gagging, I really had to control myself from throwing up. On the way out of the hospital, I stopped to use the restroom and I almost threw up in the sink while washing my hands. It really sucked. I felt nauseous for a long time. Just thinking about the saline taste would make me feel sick again. I had to keep my mind off it. Eventually with some fresh air, deep breathing, and trying not to think about it, I was OK. Maria and I ate dinner and ran to a few stores on the way home. After all that, I was just exhausted from the long, crappy day.
Sunday, July 26, 2009
I hate this port
For the second time in a row, the lab tech at the hospital had trouble with my port. She stuck the needle in me but couldn't get it to do what it needed to do. She got a nurse to come help her and they ended up pulling the first needle out, pressed on my clavicle somewhat to make the port move a bit, and stuck me with another needle. At least the second one worked. I explained to the nurse how there was trouble last time as well, including abnormal bleeding after my treatment. She knew the bleeding was unusual but didn't know for sure why that would have happened. I really hope they don't have issues every time. I know the port makes administering the chemo easier, but I really do hate it. I think about it constantly. I can't get comfortable at times because of it, I feel it under my skin and I swear, even inside me. I just want it gone, but I will make it through this.
After the blood draws were taken, Maria and I went to the day hospital to check in for my chemo. We were about 15-20 minutes early, but we didn't have anything else to do. My chemo was scheduled for 2:30pm. Around 3:00pm I went up to the reception desk to find out what the hold up was. Apparently my lab results showed something that was making them wait to find out if they could even give me the chemo that day. Of course this was concerning. What if they didn't give me the chemo? Would I have to come back the next day to try again? Would I have to keep trying everyday until my lab results showed it was OK to proceed? Finally around 3:30pm I overheard someone (a nurse maybe?) on the phone asking if they could get started on my treatment. The day hospital waiting room was nearly empty by this time. I overheard that they were given the OK to proceed by Julie, the nurse practitioner that works with my oncologist. The nurse administering my chemo told me that my white blood cell counts were lower than they would have liked, however, I had previously been given chemo when the counts were even lower. Maria and I finally left the hospital around 6:00pm. It was a long day.
So far, the side effects seem to be happening as they normally do. On both Friday and Saturday, nothing tasted normal or good, especially beverages. I don't really love water, but that's what I've been drinking because juice and soda all tasted terrible to me. I've also been pretty tired, lying around and napping for most of Saturday and today. I can feel my mouth starting to hurt as well. I just have to remember, by Wednesday - maybe Thursday - most of this will be over and I'll be feeling fairly normal again. Until next week of course.
After the blood draws were taken, Maria and I went to the day hospital to check in for my chemo. We were about 15-20 minutes early, but we didn't have anything else to do. My chemo was scheduled for 2:30pm. Around 3:00pm I went up to the reception desk to find out what the hold up was. Apparently my lab results showed something that was making them wait to find out if they could even give me the chemo that day. Of course this was concerning. What if they didn't give me the chemo? Would I have to come back the next day to try again? Would I have to keep trying everyday until my lab results showed it was OK to proceed? Finally around 3:30pm I overheard someone (a nurse maybe?) on the phone asking if they could get started on my treatment. The day hospital waiting room was nearly empty by this time. I overheard that they were given the OK to proceed by Julie, the nurse practitioner that works with my oncologist. The nurse administering my chemo told me that my white blood cell counts were lower than they would have liked, however, I had previously been given chemo when the counts were even lower. Maria and I finally left the hospital around 6:00pm. It was a long day.
So far, the side effects seem to be happening as they normally do. On both Friday and Saturday, nothing tasted normal or good, especially beverages. I don't really love water, but that's what I've been drinking because juice and soda all tasted terrible to me. I've also been pretty tired, lying around and napping for most of Saturday and today. I can feel my mouth starting to hurt as well. I just have to remember, by Wednesday - maybe Thursday - most of this will be over and I'll be feeling fairly normal again. Until next week of course.
Thursday, July 23, 2009
Numero cuatro
This afternoon I will be receiving my fourth chemotherapy treatment. I can't say that I've been looking forward to it. I never look forward to treatment days. I know it's helping me, but it's just the thought of all those chemicals going into me and the following week of various side effects, that make me dread treatment days. I wish this was all over. Sometimes it does seem to be going fast. After today, I'm pretty much halfway done with chemo treatments (as far as I know). The PET scan that I get before my next treatment will help the oncologist determine how much longer I'll need chemotherapy.
Next week will be two months since I found out I had cancer. Like many have already told me, getting downsized earlier this year really is a blessing in disguise. I've spoken to several of my former co-workers and things just sound insane there. I don't think working in that stressful of an environment would be good for me. So although I get bored a lot just sitting at home with no job, no one to talk to, and nothing interesting to do (or the energy to do it some days), at least I don't have that to deal with. Maybe by the time I'm done with all this in September/October *crosses fingers*, the job market will have improved some and I can find a good job, hopefully in the marketing arena, that maybe even offers tuition reimbursement. That would be ideal anyways.
Next week will be two months since I found out I had cancer. Like many have already told me, getting downsized earlier this year really is a blessing in disguise. I've spoken to several of my former co-workers and things just sound insane there. I don't think working in that stressful of an environment would be good for me. So although I get bored a lot just sitting at home with no job, no one to talk to, and nothing interesting to do (or the energy to do it some days), at least I don't have that to deal with. Maybe by the time I'm done with all this in September/October *crosses fingers*, the job market will have improved some and I can find a good job, hopefully in the marketing arena, that maybe even offers tuition reimbursement. That would be ideal anyways.
Tuesday, July 14, 2009
Band-aids and popsicles
At my treatment on Thursday, I saw my oncologist, Dr. Fenske and his nurse, Julie again. Julie asked all sorts of questions and I told her about all the different side effects/pains/feelings I had after each of the first two treatments. Nothing I told them about seemed to concern them, which I'll take as good. The doctor suggested I take the lorazepam they prescribed me for nausea for those nights when I'm feeling anxiety and having a hard time falling asleep since it will help any of those issue. They also said my lab tests looked good (liver, electrolytes, etc.). Of course my white blood cell counts were low, but that's expected. They seemed really happy that they could not visually see the cancer in my neck anymore and were also surpised that I still have a whole head of hair. I see them again in a month. I will have one more treatment and a PET scan before then, which will help them determine the progress of the cancer and chemo. I'm really hoping that the chemo will work on me so well that I won't have to have radiation therapy. If I need to, I of course will get it, but I really hope I won't need it.
I did have an issue after the chemo that freaked me out. Normally after the chemo, they put a band-aid over my port where the needle went in. Usually there is no blood or maybe one dot only. Well this time there was plenty of blood. The pad on the band-aid was soaked in blood and my undershirt had quite a bit soaked in as well. It wasn't bleeding anymore but I knew it wasn't normal. I worried the nurse that administered the chemo didn't do something right to "close up" the port or something. I also figured it could have been because of the nurse that put the needle in the port that morning. She missed the right spot and couldn't get blood to return, so she had to rearrange the needle inside my port a few times until the blood flowed. I called the hospital and an on-call doctor contacted me. He said to clean it up and bandage it. If it stopped bleeding then I was OK. If it keeps bleeding more than a little, then I would have to go to the ER because something is wrong. Well, it never bled again, so I just stayed home and hoped for the best. I thought about calling my doctor's office the next day for peace of mind but didn't. That's so unlike me.
This latest chemo treatment has really been taking it's toll on me. The first two days, which included my birthday on Saturday, were OK but not great. Like last time, my taste buds were extremely off. Nothing tasted right, or good for that matter. I drank mostly water those days because nothing else tasted good. Eating was hit or miss. Things didn't taste bad necessarily, just different and very mild. The main flavor I seemed to be able to taste was salt, so I'm sure I added more salt to things than necessary.
I also started feeling tired out sooner than I did before. After my first two chemo sessions, I started feeling tired on Sunday. This time, I already started feeling it a bit on Friday and for sure on Saturday. On Friday, I was already yawning by 8:00pm but we still went over by Kime & Frank's house and hung out with them and Sacha & Mark. I had a good time - it's nice when I can be out of our house, even if only to be at somebody else's house. On Saturday I slept in and then also took a nap in the early afternoon. I was really feeling tired. My dad, sister and nephew came over to visit for my birthday. We just sat outside in the nice weather and also played a game of ladderball. It was especially nice to see my nephew, since he is now 2 years old and I've only seen him one other time in the last year and a half. It's weird being called "Uncle Mike" because I'm so used to my cousins calling my dad that. Maria's nieces generally just call me "Mikey," although they know that I'm their uncle. Later on after everyone left, my mom and step-dad came over to grill out. I'm sure I was yawning all night, but still had a good time. I ate a small piece of grilled chicken, a huge grilled baked potato and some corn. The potato and corn really tasted good to me, even though I'm sure it was the extra salt I was mostly tasting.
Sunday and Monday were mostly spent with me lying around on the couch, watching TV and occasionally falling asleep. I just didn't feel up to doing anything. I felt the normal "chemo pain" in my body, although still milder than after my first treatment. I was also having really bad mouth pain. One of the side effects of the chemo is mouth sores because of the types cells the chemo kills. I can combat the pain by eating cold things like popsicles, but it still really hurt this time. I don't think I have any actual sores, just pain from the chemo.
Today, I was hoping to feel better than I do. I figured since the side effects started earlier, they might end earlier. While the mouth pain today is minimal compared to the last few days, I'm still really tired and run-down feeling. I knew I had to get to the store for a few basics like milk and bread, so that was my goal today. It took all the effort I had to get dressed and ready to go. At the store, it was really hard to walk around and push the cart. Although I was only there maybe 15 minutes, I had no energy to shop. I'm sure I was walking around at the pace of an elderly person. By the time I got home from the store, I was feeling exhausted. You would think I just ran a marathon. Even sitting here typing this blog post is a challenge. I keep taking short breaks from typing where I just sit back and sit still.
I have class tomorrow night, the first class of my last six-week course for my degree. I really wish it was over already. I already have homework due tomorrow that I haven't yet started. I just haven't been in the mood for school since this whole cancer ordeal began. At least the end is in sight for school, just not quick enough.
I did have an issue after the chemo that freaked me out. Normally after the chemo, they put a band-aid over my port where the needle went in. Usually there is no blood or maybe one dot only. Well this time there was plenty of blood. The pad on the band-aid was soaked in blood and my undershirt had quite a bit soaked in as well. It wasn't bleeding anymore but I knew it wasn't normal. I worried the nurse that administered the chemo didn't do something right to "close up" the port or something. I also figured it could have been because of the nurse that put the needle in the port that morning. She missed the right spot and couldn't get blood to return, so she had to rearrange the needle inside my port a few times until the blood flowed. I called the hospital and an on-call doctor contacted me. He said to clean it up and bandage it. If it stopped bleeding then I was OK. If it keeps bleeding more than a little, then I would have to go to the ER because something is wrong. Well, it never bled again, so I just stayed home and hoped for the best. I thought about calling my doctor's office the next day for peace of mind but didn't. That's so unlike me.
This latest chemo treatment has really been taking it's toll on me. The first two days, which included my birthday on Saturday, were OK but not great. Like last time, my taste buds were extremely off. Nothing tasted right, or good for that matter. I drank mostly water those days because nothing else tasted good. Eating was hit or miss. Things didn't taste bad necessarily, just different and very mild. The main flavor I seemed to be able to taste was salt, so I'm sure I added more salt to things than necessary.
I also started feeling tired out sooner than I did before. After my first two chemo sessions, I started feeling tired on Sunday. This time, I already started feeling it a bit on Friday and for sure on Saturday. On Friday, I was already yawning by 8:00pm but we still went over by Kime & Frank's house and hung out with them and Sacha & Mark. I had a good time - it's nice when I can be out of our house, even if only to be at somebody else's house. On Saturday I slept in and then also took a nap in the early afternoon. I was really feeling tired. My dad, sister and nephew came over to visit for my birthday. We just sat outside in the nice weather and also played a game of ladderball. It was especially nice to see my nephew, since he is now 2 years old and I've only seen him one other time in the last year and a half. It's weird being called "Uncle Mike" because I'm so used to my cousins calling my dad that. Maria's nieces generally just call me "Mikey," although they know that I'm their uncle. Later on after everyone left, my mom and step-dad came over to grill out. I'm sure I was yawning all night, but still had a good time. I ate a small piece of grilled chicken, a huge grilled baked potato and some corn. The potato and corn really tasted good to me, even though I'm sure it was the extra salt I was mostly tasting.
Sunday and Monday were mostly spent with me lying around on the couch, watching TV and occasionally falling asleep. I just didn't feel up to doing anything. I felt the normal "chemo pain" in my body, although still milder than after my first treatment. I was also having really bad mouth pain. One of the side effects of the chemo is mouth sores because of the types cells the chemo kills. I can combat the pain by eating cold things like popsicles, but it still really hurt this time. I don't think I have any actual sores, just pain from the chemo.
Today, I was hoping to feel better than I do. I figured since the side effects started earlier, they might end earlier. While the mouth pain today is minimal compared to the last few days, I'm still really tired and run-down feeling. I knew I had to get to the store for a few basics like milk and bread, so that was my goal today. It took all the effort I had to get dressed and ready to go. At the store, it was really hard to walk around and push the cart. Although I was only there maybe 15 minutes, I had no energy to shop. I'm sure I was walking around at the pace of an elderly person. By the time I got home from the store, I was feeling exhausted. You would think I just ran a marathon. Even sitting here typing this blog post is a challenge. I keep taking short breaks from typing where I just sit back and sit still.
I have class tomorrow night, the first class of my last six-week course for my degree. I really wish it was over already. I already have homework due tomorrow that I haven't yet started. I just haven't been in the mood for school since this whole cancer ordeal began. At least the end is in sight for school, just not quick enough.
Thursday, June 11, 2009
The first chemo treatment
This is how I look today, the first day I receive chemotherapy in my fight against cancer.I didn't get much sleep last night. After class I made a quick stop at Woodman's for some groceries that will hopefully help over the next few days. I picked up several cartons of chicken stock, two bottles of gatorade, a bunch of frozen juices, and some yogurt. Based on what I've heard from Sarah (who is dealing with Hodgkin's now) and Rebecca (who kicked cancer's ass 12 years ago!) I'm going to want to stick to a liquid diet for a few days. I also knew that I would have a hard time falling asleep so I attempted to make myself exhausted by watching TV and staying awake as long as possible. I ended up heading to bed around 1:15am. Not the best when you have to be at the hospital at 8:00am dressed and showered. I'm assuming I got some sleep during the 5 hours until I had to get up and start getting ready, but it didn't feel like much. I remember thinking a lot during the night about everything, including about how much sleep I wasn't getting.
After a snooze or two, I got up this morning around 6:30am. We left the house for Froedtert at about 7:45am and of course ran into traffic on I-894. When you haven't had to get up fand go to work in months, you sort of forget about things like morning traffic. We probably would have only been about 10 minutes late for my appointment however we were given wrong directions inside the hospital. So my 8:00am appointment to have the port put in probably didn't get underway until at least 8:45am. A few nurses checked my vitals and put in an IV. I found out that I was going to be only lightly sedated - enough to make me calmer but not enough to put me to sleep. At first I was nervous about that, but after talking with the doctor, it made the most sense. I'm sure the dose of Ativan (anti-anxiety medicine) they gave me helped. They injected antibiotics through the IV to help prevent the risk of infection.
This is what the port that will go inside of me looks like.Once inside the procedure room, I was awake the entire time, talking to the nurses, and was just overall comfortable. I was never groggy or out of it. I couldn't see what was going on, which I appreciated. Most of my chest and head was covered with a blue cloth. I could look to my left and see parts of the room or the occasional nurse or aide that was standing by. The only pain I felt during the procedure was from the needle used to numb the area and the actual lidocaine stung quite a bit. Pretty soon I was already being wheeled back to recovery. I had a newly implanted port near my right collar bone, just ready to get used and abused! They gave me my first meal of the day, a plain turkey sandwich and Sun Chips, and after about an hour, I was free to go.
We only had about 30 minutes before my chemotherapy appointment so we stopped for Maria to get a quick lunch at the 87th St Bistro inside the cancer center. I checked in at the Day Hospital on the 3rd floor of the cancer center. I expected that I would be more nervous than I was. I think that Ativan I was given earlier was really working.
Eventually my name was called and Maria and I were taken to a private room. The rooms have a small LCD TV hooked up to a DVD player, so we rented "Ghost Town" starring Ricky Gervais from Netflix to watch during the process. The nurse hooked the IV machine up to my newly installed port and away we went. First was anti-nausea medications and then the actual chemo drugs. I am getting a typical combination of four chemo drugs known as ABVD. The nurse injected a small dose of bleomycin (if I remember correctly) by hand to test for allergic reaction. Since I was OK, she could then give me the full dose. Three of the drugs were injected by hand by the nurse while the last, dacarbazine, is injected using a drip bag over a 30 minute period. The nurse seemed to enjoy the movie and wants to rent it herself now.
Once all the chemo drugs were dispensed, the nurse flushed my port, bandaged it up and sent us on our way. I am now at home, pretty much feeling OK. The main pain I feel is in my upper chest/neck area where the port was put in. It's pretty hard to turn my neck left or right or look up or down without feeling it. Hopefully that only lasts a few days. I'm still feeling the effects of the bone marrow biopsy from Monday, but it is improving each day.
So tonight and the next few days will be the hard ones. I'm prepared as best as I can to feel exhausted, sick, pain, whatever. I'm hoping I'm one of those fluke patients that don't get bad side-effects, but that's probably wishful thinking.
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